MLB Power Rankings, or Which Team Sucks The Most

Best record in baseball and winners of nine straight. Ranks number one in offense and the pitching has kept us in some games. The big test? Getting out of June and July with a heavy road schedule.


Why put the Rays ahead of the Phillies. Fuck Philly "itis", that's why. The Rays have better pitching right now. Upton, Crawford, Pena, and Longoria are exciting and exceeding expectations. Not sure if they can keep it up to win the A.L. east, but should be able to contend for a wild card if health agrees with them.

Well here they are. After a rough start they now own the fourth best record in the league. Chase Utley is crazy good. .325 batting, with 21 homers and 53 driven in. His .o.p.s. is 1.092. Jimmy Rollins, Ryan "Mr. K." Howard, and Pat Burrell lead a great offense. It took a while, but Burrell has it figured out. Pitching is weak, although Brad Lidge is back to form.

Last week, ESPN ranked these guys 9th, behind the White Sox, Marlins and Blue Jays. Laughable. Pedroia and Ellsbury have a combined 121 hits. Team batting avg. is .282, and they have the pitching depth to go back to the post-season. Health will be an issue down the road, but please, the Red Sox have been stacked for years and continue to win.

The L.A. Angels are one better in the win and loss column, but the Cards better them in batting with .276 to the Angels .256. Both teams e.r.a. are the same around 3.90. Pujols rbi's are down this year, but still batting .362, including 75 hit, and 14 home runs. If you look up and down the roster, everybody is producing. Molina(Yadier), owns the dish now! Ankiel, Glaus, Ludwig. You're fucking kidding me right? The pitching has been great too. What the hell! I curse you Cardinals. I curse you! Leave the Cubs alone already. Jesus!

Seemingly a better line-up than the Cardinals and are first in their division. A virtual tie in rankings, but the Cards are the surprise ahead of them.

I cannot put the White Sox ahead of the Marlins. Just can't do it. Slightly better batting by ten points, and that's not saying much. E.r.a is high at 4.48, but the offense is clicking and right behind the Phillies in the east.

Second in the A.L. in pitching with an e.r.a. of 3.36. High in strikeouts and keeping the base on balls low as well. Pitching is the ONLY thing keeping them in games, and I feel they don't deserve the ranking, but they are in first place. Without potential All-Star Carlos Quentin, the Sox are an embarrassment on offense. Thome(.208), Konerko(.202), Swisher(.202), Cabrera(.240), Uribe(.198). Astoundingly leading the A.L. central. Horribly boring team that waits for the offense to produce. Trot on Paulie. Trot on.

The Braves are fourth in the entire league in pitching with an e.r.a. of 3.58. Team batting ranks fifth in all of baseball with an avg. of .276, led by All-Star Chipper Jones's .409. Pitching will be a problem with them eventually, with Smoltz now hanging in the bullpen, and his retirement imminent.

Still have to put the D-Backs ahead of the A's and Blue Jays, who are both among tops in pitching throughout the league, but offensively stale. Arizona is fifth in the entire league in pitching and batting. They have a young team that is slumping right now, but I fully expect them to recover and win the division easily. Still in first place, the Dodgers have the only realistic chance of competing.

The rest
11. Oakland
12. Toronto
13. Twins
14. Astros
15. Yankees
16. Rangers
17. Dodgers
18. Indians
19. Orioles
20. Brewers
21. Tigers
22. Pirates
23. Giants
24. Reds
25. Nationals
26. Padres
27. Mariners
28. Royals
29. Rockies
30. Mets- Yeah that's right. They suck, and if you like them, YOU SUCK!